Tuesday, April 7, 2020

14 Things For 14 Years I Can’t Believe It

Wow! It's that time of year again. It's funny how I used to think that time went to slow, and now it feels like it  flies by. Maybe I'm just getting old haha. Not that I ever meant for the significance of today to have this sort of connotation, but I felt like whenever I talked about this day it was always negative. So that's why I thought I would write 14 things that I've experienced in the past 14 years, that have either taught me something about myself, or 14 things I have discovered about myself etc. BUT first I would like to start out with a quote that I think fits perfectly. 

I hope no matter what darkness you're dragged through, you never loose sight of your brilliance. Because even if you don't see your light, it's there. Even if you don't feel your heartbeat, it's drumming in your chest. Even if you don't think you can push through, you can one step one breath at a time. 

The reason I put this particular quote down, was because that is the number one thing I've struggled with for the past 14 years. That light went dim for many years, but now, I'm trying to light up the world with the things I've learned. So let's get started. And by the way, this list is just a summary, I can't even begin to imagine what I will learn in years to come. For probably the first time in 14 years, I'm excited for what the future holds. 

14 Things I have Learned Through having a stroke at age 17 and being a chronically ill teen.

1.NEVER EVER EVER EVER take your health for granted. From a person who's never going to have complete health back in her life anytime soon, just please don't.
2. Just because you feel like the old you is gone, doesn't mean you can't try to create a new you.
3. Life doesn't always go as planned and that’s OK! Sometimes it’s more than ok!!
4. Life is literally and figuratively like a bowl in a china shop. Oh yeah with 30 toddlers running around. They can break. And yes they can sometimes be put back together but you will constantly have that “scar on the bowl to tell you something happened to me...
5. Forgiveness is more healing than you will EVER be able to comprehend, for both the giver and receiver.
6. There is no definition of the word perfect- you as a person (in how you act towards others and how you present yourself) define perfect for yourself-that's what makes you unique.
7. Instead of letting your illness define you, let yourself define your illness. Don't become just a stereotypical "chronic person," after all you do have a reputation to uphold.
8 .My ability to accept things that can go wrong, both openly and graciously, defies all human understanding (Or so I’m told...).
9. Sometimes admitting you're sad is the most freeing thing you will ever do for yourself, and you'll thank yourself for it later, even though it feels like defeat at that moment.
10. I've become inspired to be something I didn't have. I want to be a light in someone's darkness.
11. That there is a huge difference between being conceited and actually practicing self love, and it's time that more people know the difference.
12. Creating a second "version" of yourself, isn't failure. It's creativity at it's finest.
13.DO NOT under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES USE WebMD. Just don't do it. You'll thank me later.
14. JUST BE THANKFUL EVERYDAY. Just be thankful for your life, be thankful that your muscles can do what you want them to do, just don't waste a day.

To be honest, I could write probably for the next two days about different things I've noticed and learned throughout the past 14 years, but that would take forever. So I will end with this. No matter what you go through in life there's always another side that everybody is envious of. Everything in life comes from perspective. This experience has definitely changed my perspective. I may say I hate what the past 16 years have done to my body, but I love the adult I have turned into and would never give that up! And in terms of Corona(that I've managed to not talk about for this entire blog post even though the entire world has been immersed in the quick sand of COVID-19, don't fret friends. Everything has a beginning and an end. This too will end and we will be stronger when it does!